Sigh.

Sometimes I just find how ridiculous and brainless I am to feel affected over trivial matters. To me, it's not.

It's normal for people to just mock and laugh and get over it whereas it brings a great impact on me.

To blame myself for insecurities, too much thoughts or it's really not my fault?

Most of the time I just don't know what and where I am heading to, but some times I just laugh and get over the thoughts. It just keeps haunting back. 

I guess I need to find an alternative to make myself feel better.

I get comforts from loved ones, and realised it's actually myself and I for having unnessecary thoughts and threats to myself. 

I swear the next time I go on stage I will not shiver anymore. This is the worst feeling ever, to shiver and tremble infront of everyone. And you get laughs and compliments which you don't know if they are trying to make you feel better or it was sincerely true. 

Not really a good speech for the first attempt in my whole life. 

And this is not really the main reason. But I was really humilliated ha ha ha T-T

Okay first and last. This is just to express how I feel, and not rant. Ok byeeeeee.